Girl on Fire
by beezy bee
Summary: A series of one shots from different character POV's... Give it a chance I promise you will like it!
1. Girl on Fire

**So I've been toying with the idea of writing a series of one shots that take place throughout the Hunger Games series. I have been fascinated with the "minor" characters that made up this series and this is my way of giving them a voice. So here goes, I'm going to start off with Prim and depending on whether or not I get any reviews or responses I will continue to publish different points of view! So let me know what you think!**

**I Do Not Own Any Of These Characters, Nor Do I Own The General Plot**

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><p><strong>Girl On Fire<strong>

I stand by the window watching my sister pace her way across the street. She is restless. I don't blame her, she has never been one for coping instead preferring to run. Not like my mother of course, she has always been careful to run only far enough away so that she could return to my side at the nearest sign of need. That is until she volunteered for the Hunger Games. I know she did it to protect me and to ensure that I was alive to see the next reaping, however when she got on that train there was no coming back, there was no protecting me from what I was about to experience. I didn't know it then but I relied on her so heavily, always assuming she would be there to take care of me and lessen every blow that came my way. Nothing could have prepared me for watching her on the television, watching her struggle and suffer and then of course succeed. I have never been so scared, wondering what would happen to my mother and I if she should fail, I knew Gale would always take care of us, but I don't think my mother could handle losing another loved one, she barely pulled through the last loss, and she only pulled through that because of my sisters unwavering determination to pull her through it, I don't have that sort of strength. I could never fight as hard as she did and continues to do.

The sister who returned from those games is not the same sister I said goodbye to. She tries to hide it, but I know that she is haunted by demons I can't even imagine. Her screams at night cause me to lay awake hoping and wishing that some sweet mercy would take hold and deliver my sister to safety, allow her some safe refuge from her own mind. I know this will never happen, because I know what it is to see death, once he visits you or someone near you, he never truly forgets you, making it impossible to forget him. I have seen the lives of countless men, women and children fade away as I hold their hand and slowly comfort them into peace. Death and I are old friends, often greeting one another as he takes the hand of the poor soul I have comforted and leads them on to where ever it is that they go, for I am certain that something must happen, something great, in order to make all this suffering worth it.

Just then I am met with the questioning gaze of my sister, she has finally noticed me sitting here staring at her. I wave half heartedly and get up to go meet her outside.

"Hey little duck, is everything alright?" she asks as her eyes scan me for any possible signs of harm.

"Yeah I was just marvelling at how beautiful the victor's village looks with all this snow, and thinking about taking some food down to the seam to hand out, maybe take Lady with me since she loves visiting the kids."

"She's a goat Prim, she does not know the difference between her paddock and the president's mansion" she sighs, clearly exasperated with my innocence. I can't be honest and tell her that I worry about her or try to care for her because the only thing holding her together is her need to protect me and my mother from the world. She does not know that I have pieced together the trouble she caused with her trick at the end of the games, I may be young but even I know that the capitol will not tolerate being mocked for long.

Deciding to ignore her jab at my beloved pet I decide to change the topic, "You know, you could just go talk to him" I mumble as I nod my head in the direction of our new neighbours house.

"I have no idea what you're talking about Prim, I don't want to talk to him or anybody else for that matter. I am fine on my own, in fact I'm better off on my own." She snaps at me, I watch as she transforms in front of my eyes, her posture becomes tense and her eyes become cold and void of emotion.

Deciding to push my luck I press on, "then what are you doing out here, wearing your tracks a good 6 inches into the ground? You're not alone Katniss, you are surrounded by people who love you and want to help you, all you have to do is let us."

"Maybe I don't deserve their love" She mumbles quietly as she turns away from me. Before I can say anything else, she swings back around trying to hide the sorrow wracking her body "I've got to go, I promised Haymitch I'd wake him up before the Hob closes for the night" and without waiting for a reply she turns back around and hastens away.

I stare after my beloved sister picturing the girl she used to be, the one who sang and danced and picked wildflowers in the forest with our father. Who then became the young women who kept a family alive by hunting and gathering, and gaining a sense of accomplishment from that. She may have tried to appear tough and strong but she was surrounded by those who loved her, and who she loved in return, in her own way.

"One day she'll realize we're all here waiting for her to come to her senses and she'll accept our love and in return love us back" a voice whispers behind me. I gasp and spin around quickly to find Peeta standing there with a tray of cheese buns in his arms. "I was just on my way over to your house to drop these off and I couldn't help but overhear".

"Do you really believe she'll get better?" I ask clinging to his words a little more then I should.

"I don't know, do you? You know her much better than I do" is his neutral response. I then realize that he is only trying to appease me, make me feel better. Like everyone else he has assumed that I am too naive to understand or accept the reality that I live in. Suddenly I am desperate for someone to understand, for someone to see that I am no longer this little naive girl who doesn't understand the world and needs to be protected from it.

"No I don't, I mean my mother never did. She has never accepted what she has or ever been able to truly pull herself out of the fog that she has existed in ever since my father died." I wince a little bit at the brutal honesty of my words, I could never say these things to my mother or Katniss. "The similarities between the two of them never cease to amaze me. They are both so brave, strong and compassionate, and yet they hinder this with their own need to dwell in what has happened in the past." My eyes widen as realization hits with what I've just done. That is the only time I have ever spoken poorly of eith my mother or Katniss. I instantly want to take it back, shove that thinking back down inside where it belongs.

I look up and meet Peeta's gaze about to beg him to forget everything I have just said, but I stop when I see his face, his expression holds surprise, but just below that I see something else, something I've never seen before, could it be respect?

"I have to be honest with you Prim, I have always known that you inherited certain traits from your family. Your fathers kindness and love for life, your mother's healing hands and strength and of course your sister's compassion and beauty but I have never given you credit for the piece that resides within your soul that is all your own, your faith. Your ability to look at anyone and see the good in them even after all the bad you've experienced. Your ability to love and the passion you hold for those you love." Peeta stops to make sure I am listening to what he is saying and making sure I am registering the truth behind his words. "Don't let anyone destroy that, don't let this world convince you that your faith is invalid or misdirected because if you lose faith in us, in our species, then there really is no hope. I truly believe that your sister will get better, she has a fire within her that will never stop burning until her last breathe; she is girl on fire after all." I shudder at his words, I hate that phrase that the capitol has attached to my sister. There is nothing pleasant about being on fire nor anything admirable about a person engulfed in flames, they may be feared and unchallenged but they do not feel anything but the flames engulfing them.

With that he hands me the buns and starts back towards his house. I stand there and watch him go feeling the heat from the buns seep into my hands. That was the first time me and Peeta had really had a conversation that required any amount of intimacy. I was amazed at how much he had observed about me in order to make those claims about my character, I didn't know if all or any of it was true, but it was a nice thought. Never once did he call me innocent or naive, which in itself is a small miracle.

I decide to take the buns home and then walk down to the seam to hand out some of Lady's cheese and some cans of stew that arrived with the last shipment. As I'm walking along I continually drift back to what Peeta said about Katniss, about how she would get better because of the fire that burns deep within her soul. I realize that he is right, Katniss does have plenty of fire within her, a tenacity that is unmatched in any other human being. However, what he does not realize is that that will not be the reason she gets better. Her fire will only fuel her anger and sorrow, it will eat away at her until she is completely consumed by it. It will be because Peeta's refreshing gentleness, it is exactly what she needs to help control that fire. This is when I realize that my beautiful sister has found her soul mate, even if she doesn't know it yet. One day she will realize that it is Peeta who she can't survive without, and when that day happens I know that my sister will truly be all right. On that day she will no longer be Katniss, girl on fire.

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><p><strong>And there you have it! My first Hunger Games Fanfic! Please let me know what you thought, and if you think it's worthwhile continuing. Also constructive feedback is more than welcome! If you have any characters you would like to see a perspective from please let me know and I will do my best to write it!<strong>


	2. Fuelling the Fire

Well here is the second viewpoint. I'm sorry it took so long! This one has been incredibly hard to write, I had to stop writing and rewrite so many times hopefully I did the character justice, I believe his viewpoint is one that needs to be told the most.

Thanks for all the kind reviews! You guys are really awesome! I hope you enjoy this one as much as you liked the first one!

I do not own any of the characters, nor do I own a majority of the plot

**Fuelling The Fire**

"The male and female tributes will be reaped from their existing pool of victors" these words were swimming around my head as I bolted for the door. I couldn't believe it, not again, I just got her back. I was about to relive my worst nightmare and there is absolutely nothing I could do about it.

Watching those games was the hardest thing I've ever had to do, not only because of the pain and terror I could see Katniss experiencing, but because of the budding relationship I had to watch develop. Peeta's feelings for Katniss are undoubtedly true, however I know that there are those who doubt Katniss's affection in return. I'm not one of those people. I know my best friend better than anyone else, and I can tell when she's lying, and as much as I wish she was, I know that she wasn't. I'm not even sure she has realized it yet, as she has never been one for self reflection and always been quick to lean on the side of denial. I understand why though, how could you not go through something as awful as the games and not find that remaining spirit to be kindred with your own? I do not blame her, I only regret not being the one to go with her. It was the ultimate betrayal, I let my hunting partner go into the most dangerous hunt possible alone, while I sat at home watching her struggle from the safety of my couch. I have never hated the Capitol more in my entire life, I have this burning fire within me that refuses to grant me relief from its constant smoulder.

Now I will have to do it all again, watch Katniss go back into that game and this time probably die. I am not stupid, I know that this is a plot by President Snow to have Katniss killed as publicly as possible. I have been watching these games my entire life and as skilled as she is, Katniss does not stand a chance against some of the previous victors. Peeta will go with her of course, and will do his best to keep her alive, but it won't ease my conscience, it should be me. Again I will be forced to sit on my couch and watch Prim silently cry while my own soul splinters into a thousand pieces. Again I will be forced to watch the love of my life hurt and suffer for the pleasure of the capitol. Again I will be forced to accept that no matter what I do I will never again spend an afternoon hunting with the beautiful, amazing Katniss I once knew. For if by some miracle she survives this ordeal, I will never get her back because for her to live, Peeta will have to die and there is no way she will mentally survive that.

I have travelled enough of a distance now that I am in no danger of being found for a while. So I sink down into the snow and begin to sob. The numbing cold is comforting to the fire burning within, I allow myself to give in to the crushing pain that threatens to take me over every day. I allow myself this moment of weakness for it will have to be my last. After this I will be forced to put my pain away deep within my being because I am needed, I have responsibilities that I cannot forget for fear of losing the only things that mean as much to me as Katniss, my family.

So I lay there and sob, wishing the cold would numb everything and take me away, why hadn't I listened to her when she had begged me to run away with her? I was so blinded by my jealousy that I couldn't see reason. I had myself convinced that if I could just fight and defeat the Capitol everything would be alright, all the damage that they had done would be reversed. That Katniss and I could go back to being the way we were. Why hadn't I gone? We could have survived and made it far away before this announcement could be made, why had I been so hell bent on assisting this pointless revolution?

The revolution. Perhaps I cannot change what is to be with Katniss, I cannot save her from her fate. She will have to go back in, at least perhaps we can train, prepare for it, but we cannot stop it. No, she will have to go. I can however make them pay. Make them wish that they had never heard the name Katniss Everdeen. I may not be able to save her, but I can Avenge her.

I sit up and wipe away my tears, with every breath I take I can feel the deep, crushing sorrow being replaced by anger. Katniss had mentioned that the other districts were starting to revolt, they can't be happy about this decision, their idols and heroes being forced back into the arena, this could be the spark that Katniss had mentioned. Perhaps this will be the final straw.

I stand up and begin to pace back and forth running through strategies in my head, how could we organize? Where would we go first? I'm so deep in my thoughts that it takes me a moment to register that there is someone walking down the street towards me. They look angry, they are kicking stones and yelling, clearly assuming the same confidence I had when I first arrived. As I look on, I realize that this person looks strangely beaten, as though the anger is only a show, a way of hiding something else. Just then they collapse to the ground and begin sobbing, the sounds are loud and sound as though they are ripping apart his lungs with every breath. It is then that I realize I know this person, Peeta Mellark is crouching not two hundred feet from me sobbing for all the world to hear. I attempt to back up and retreat, to allow him some privacy but as I step back I kick an empty can that I had not noticed before, I swear as the can goes rattling away from me and glance back to see if my location has been given away. It has. Peeta is staring right at me with a look of complete devastation.

"Hey" I mutter, stepping out of the shadows "I was just out for a walk, trying to clear my head, I wasn't trying to spy on you or anything like that" I tell him as I take a few strides towards him. The air is thick with tension and awkwardness as Peeta realizes the rim of red that circles my eyes disclosing my real reason for being out here.

"Don't worry about it, I just needed some air to clear my head" was his quiet reply.

"I don't think any amount of air is going to help you there" I said before I could stop myself.

Peeta chuckled humourlessly in response "no I suppose your right, there really is no chance of me clearing my head"

"Well, I should get home and see how my mom is doing. Don't want her to worry." I said as I turned to walk away.

"I'm going to die you know. There is no way I am making it back a second time." Came his voice from behind me,

"You don't know that for sure." I assured him as I turned back around "nobody does, you survived once before, there's no telling the outcomes this time around."

"I can. There is no way I am going to let Katniss die. I will protect her with my last breath, she is all that I have to live for. Returning without her would be like dying, there would be no point."

"I understand, I cannot admonish you for something I would do myself." Is my only reply.

"She loves you, you know. She may be confused now, but she loves you. The only reason she is confused is because of the experience we share, only I know the horrors she witnessed, I am haunted by the same images that wake her screaming in the night. One day she will overcome her trauma and when she does that, it will be you she runs to." He is looking down at a stone lodged in the road nudging it with his toe. I can see the pain it gives him to say those things.

"That's where your wrong. The Katniss I once knew is gone, and will never return. She died in those games. The Katniss that now exists clings to the idea of loving me because she wants to believe that she can find that girl again. You know better than I that that will never happen. You don't recover from something like that, you learn to bear it and find a way to live past it, but you don't recover. You two have formed a bond that cannot be broken. If you die for her in that arena, she will not leave you there. She will find a way to live through it, but you will always be there with her and that alone means that she will never be completely mine."

"Either way it seems as though we both have the same goal, will you help us prepare in order to have the best chance possible in that arena? If I am going to keep her alive, it would be best if I didn't die in the first five minutes."

"I will do my best" I agreed mournfully and began to walk away but before I could get to far I stopped and turned around, "Peeta," I started, as he looked up at me with a questioning gaze "in any other circumstance I would have bet on you, I consider you a friend if only because I have no choice but to trust you with her life."

"Ah, but don't you understand? It's my life too." Was all he said before turning away to disappear into the darkness of the night. I knew that tomorrow he would be the same old Peeta, the one who had nothing but optimism and strength to support his friends. Tonight, he gets to be weak, he gets to grieve and be fearful because tomorrow he needs to push it back and march bravely down his designated path.

Tonight; my fire has erupted, I feel as though I am being consumed. It is as though someone has poured gasoline on the fire and stood back to watch me burn. All I can see is red, I want blood. Not just for me but for my family and friends who have loved and lost, for Peeta who has had to give up everything and is now being forced to do it again and most of all for Katniss who will never again be herself, who will be lost forever and with her the future I had hoped for. I want the Capitol to know what it is to be messed with, to know the pain I have inside and know that for as long as they live there will never be an end. I want them to fear the day when their child is born, because they know that the older they get the more the innocence will be beat out of them. I want them to know what it is like to watch your parents die or grieve and what it is to watch your friends wither away until one day they are no more. I want them to feel the pains of hunger and cold but most of all I want them to know what it is to have loved and lost. I want them to know what it is to love someone with all your being and then watch that person cease to exist and transform into a shell of what once was. I want all this because this is what they've done to me, this is the reality they have forced me to live and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it theirs as well.

There you have it! Gale's POV. Please let me know what you think! If you liked it I can post another one soon! Also if you have any requests for who you would like to read feel free to suggest it!

Thanks for reading!


	3. Envious Compassion

_Hey all, here is the next POV for you! I didn't hear from anyone about the last chapter so I'm hoping you guys like this one enough to review, please let me know what you think! _

**Envious Compassion**

I sit here feeling the morphling drip into my body, feel the fog start to blur my mind. I hate this girl before me, the one I was so willing to give my life for in order to have her be the "face" of the rebellion. She is repulsive, always arguing, never just going along with anything. Everything has to be her way all the time and it's so irritating. Except the problem is that this isn't true, I don't hate her, not even kind of. She actually reminds me of myself a little tons of attitude and tenacity to compensate for a lack of personality. Though she occasionally really does bother me it's more like how I would imagine a little sister would antagonize and frustrate. It has been so long since I have let someone into my life and allowed myself to care for them. After what the capitol did to me, and my friends and family I can't bear to open myself up like that again, allow myself to be so vulnerable as to have any of my wellbeing exist separate from my body. There are a few who have made it through the cracks in these walls, but those are people who have witnessed and experienced what I have, people like Finnick who in my opinion have had it worse.

I don't hate her, I envy her, even though she experienced an extreme trauma, especially for one so young it is nothing compared to what was awaiting her. She was so naive, believing that once you win the games that's it, you win, no strings attached. No, she never had to experience that, she was saved from those experiences. The option of demoralizing yourself until there is nothing left, or lose all those you held dear was not a choice she had to make. Well not everyone, the Capitol learned after me, you see once you kill everyone there is no bargaining chips left on the table. No one to threaten in order to command obedience. I'm sure President Snow was beside himself when he saw her at the reaping. She played right into their hands, gave them every tool they could ever need to get exactly what they wanted from her. Stupid girl.

She looks so innocent lying here, and young. I forget how young she is, not even a full adult yet and already seen so much, done so much. She surprised me in those first games, I will admit. Once she got a hold of that bow there was no stopping her. I don't think anyone else stood a chance against her, her hatred and determination fuelled her success. Her skill was shocking all things considered, but that's not what I envied, not what I wished I possessed. Instead it was her compassion, watching her sing to that little girl or caring for Peeta, more than that even; simply choosing to offer comfort rather than seeking victims was admirable. Especially in a place where no one would offer her the same. She is truly good at heart despite her tough exterior and that is something I wish I could say I possessed.

I think maybe at some point in my life I did possess it, it is possible that in my youth I was innocent and pure of heart, but it has been so long since then that I cannot remember what it feels like. I cannot remember what it is to care for someone and be cared for in return. It has been so long since I have slept through the night, since I haven't woken up screaming and reaching to save that person who I never will. I'm haunted, broken and now more than that I am dead. After months of torture and begging for it end, I am finally dead, now when I am finally safe. My will has broken, I no longer wish to fight or live I simply want to remain here in this fog and never again face reality. I used to mock those victor's from six who relied so heavily on this drug, and now I laugh at myself for not seeing that they were not weak, but smart. This world is so much better than the one we live in, the one where your past follows you wherever you go. I have been to the brink of insanity and back, and now I will choose to remain insane.

This all seems like a great plan until I look back at her, in her I see a future, a place where I am safe. I don't understand why but I can't shake this feeling that I owe it to her, that if I don't succeed it will mean that she can't either. She is in for a long recovery if she ever wishes to be "together" again and it won't be an easy one, but I know she can do it. She still has so much fire and determination left within her soul, something the Capitol didn't have a chance to beat out of her and I feel like I owe it to her, to show her that it is possible. That you can recover and start anew.

"That stuff will lead you down a dark road" I nearly jump out of my skin as I turn around to see who the spy is. Haymitch stands in the doorway watching me as I float along and observe his charge.

"Yeah well I've been down many roads, none of them bright, what makes this one any different?" I answer as I turn away from him, hoping he'll leave. It doesn't work, instead he draws up a chair beside me and begins to speak.

"She's something else isn't she? Drives you nuts one second and the next you want to pull her into your harms and protect her from everything and anything."

"No, mostly she just drives me nuts" is the only reply I can think of in this foggy state.

"Yeah well, we were a lot like her once, thought we had the answers, thought we would eventually get over the damage of the games." Is his quiet reply. He isn't looking at me either, instead he is looking at her with a deep affection I have never seen from him before.

"Well maybe we've saved her in time, maybe she won't turn into the shell of the people we have become, perhaps with the help of her family she will move past her trauma and become more then her past. I mean anyone who has spent any time with her knows how strong she is. Her determination radiates off her. Not to mention, she does have something you and I never had."

"What's that?" he glances at me briefly before turning back to her

"Love; she gives love to those who everyone else disregards, and she definitely draws that affection out of even the coldest hearts. I mean look at you, you can deny it all you want but I've never seen you look at anything with so much affection that wasn't made out of glass and filled with clear liquid."

"Hmph, this isn't affection you see, it's pity." Is his gruff response, he then gets up and moves to leave but before he can I grab his arm.

"It's affection, maybe even love, and you know it. You forget, it was me to whom you first came pleading for me to help save her life. You came to me and told me that she was the "face of the rebellion" and was essential to the success of our cause."

"She was, and still is!" he angrily bursts and yanks his arm out of my grip, but then stops moving, he wants to know what else I have to say.

"You know Peeta would have been just as useful, and definitely more complacent. He's much more likable then her, and you know it. No, the reason you came pleading for her life is the same reason so many of us agreed to help you save it. We all see ourselves in her, and more importantly see her potential to rise up and be better than we ever were." He sinks back down to his chair and absently brushes a piece of hair from her face.

"You don't get it, I knew her mother, I was a few years older but still, and I knew her father even better. We grew up in the seam together. I've watched her grow up from a smiling, happy girl to a fierce determined woman who can haggle and stand her ground. Even more then that I've watched her fight everyday for something I can't even remember having, her family. Mentoring her in those games was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, I couldn't do it again; not alone." His head sinks down into his hands and he looks truly pitiful sitting there.

"You know, I think she's going to pull through this whole thing, and be better than any of us can even imagine. Peeta too, I know everyone is panicking now, but I was beside him all night every night through all the torture and screams, and he never stopped calling out her name. Never."

"I think they're both better even now then we can even imagine. To go into something so terrible and find a way to love is a feat I never could have imagined. I think they are the perfect people to lead this country into a new world, a better world." And with that Haymitch get's up and leaves, probably to go and find some form of alcohol to drown his sorrows, but not before leaning down and giving Katniss a gentle kiss on the forehead. "Good luck, girl on fire" he mutters as he walks out the door.

I think about what Haymitch said about her leading us into the new world, and I realize that he is right, whether she frustrates me or not her and Peeta represent what is good in this world, they found beauty in one of the ugliest places imaginable. They have already seen this place the rest of us are striving to find, and it will be them who finally allows us to glimpse it.

With that thought I reattach her morphling drip and make my way back to my own bed, where I will undoubtedly sink back into the horrors of my reality, but not before I finally get a small glimpse of our bright future in the sleeping face of a teenage girl.

_And there it is! Review! Review! Review! Also any suggestions for future POV's are welcome! Thanks!_


	4. A Long Starless Night

_Okay, so here is the next Point of View! Sorry it took so long, I have been in school and crazy swamped with papers! Apparently my professors don't except "writing Hunger Games Fanfics" as a viable excuse for turning in my papers late. Enjoy._

_I do not own the characters or the plot._

**A Long Starless Night**

I wake up with a start and a small gasp, instinctively I reach out for Katniss, and feel terror rise up when she isn't there. Then at the height of my panic I gain full consciousness and realize that I am not back in the arena of my nightmares but my own bed in my home just three doors down from the love of my life who is safe and sound. I sigh and stretch as I realize that it is early morning and so I quickly accept the fact that no more sleep with come to me today. I start to get up, but then fall back into my bed and start dwelling on the past few months. It has been altogether overwhelming, I've ranged from pure terror to pure euphoria to complete heart break time and time again, and no matter how hard I try I just can't seem to get a grip. I know that my love for Katniss runs as deep as a canyon within me, and that my love for her makes up my entire being, it's who I am and always will be.

I am able to accept that she may never feel for me the way I feel for her and that while I may always wish for more, she will probably always be emotionally unattainable. What I struggle with most is the knowledge that she loves me, maybe not as strongly as I love her and maybe not even the same way but she does, and that's what makes it impossible to come to terms with our relationship and intertwining future. Ever since that day six years ago when she came crawling to my door I have never been able to shake the feeling that I would do anything for her. I watched her grow from a beautiful happy girl, to a hungry survivor, into a strong independent woman and throughout all of it wished that I was not only a simple observer in her life, but also a companion within it. It would seem that on the day of the reaping my worst fears and biggest dreams came together. I would finally have the opportunity to be close to Katniss, but would also have to accept the inevitable fact that I would die while doing it. Even now, when I am alive and engaged to the woman of my dreams, I find myself wondering if I will ever be a companion and not just an observer.

Had she really been faking it? Had she really been acting that whole time in the cave and afterwards? My mind tells me yes, of course she was, and for good reason, it kept us alive didn't it? My heart on the other hand doesn't agree, I know Katniss, and if nothing else I know that she is a terrible liar. I know that she loves me in some form, or else she never would have put those berries in her mouth, and I know that she found comfort in my embrace just as I found comfort in hers. What I don't know is if she loves me despite the games or because of them, and that is where my problem lies. If she loves me despite the games then there is a chance that we could be happy together, a chance that once time passes, she will find comfort in my embrace again; but if she loves me because of the games then our relationship is doomed, we could never grow together if the only reason to stay together is the experience we share. However, due to the recent turn in events, I suppose all this pondering is pointless. We are to be married and there is nothing either of us can do about it. So in a way I guess our relationship will always be in part because of the games, since it is President Snow who is forcing this marriage upon us. The more important question to be asking is whether or not any of our relationship exists despite the games, and I believe that the answer lies somewhere in that handful of berries.

I finally get up and out of bed only to be struck by an intense realization: today is the reading of the card. Today we will find out what the next quarter quell has in store for the districts, and Katniss and I will learn what we as mentors are up against in the next few months. At least this is what my mother thinks, after we heard about the mandatory viewing tonight my mother explained to me that the Quarter Quell is accompanied by the reading of the card, which informs the districts about the new rules in place for this year's Hunger Games. This idea is both terrifying and thrilling, we will have to watch our tributes suffer to the brink of terror and back just as we did, which will be painful and terrifying for those of us who hold the key to their survival. However, Katniss and I will be back in the public eye and will have to go back to our couple status, she will have to speak with me and interact with me on a daily basis which is both painful and euphoric at the same time. Perhaps this will provide opportunity for us to come to terms with each other and our approaching marriage, I would rather be married to a friend then someone who cannot stand to be in the same room as me.

After a small breakfast I begin to bake some cheese buns to take over to Katniss, when I get there though it is only her mother at home and after a few minutes of small talk I return home. I promised my mother I would come to her house to watch the announcement tonight so I decide to spend the afternoon painting colors into my nightmares. I discovered this a few months ago when I was icing a cake, it had been a long restless night and when I began to ice the cake I realized that the images from my nightmare were appearing in my icing, so I decided to try it with paint. As I painted the images that haunted me at night, I found that they terrified me less. I was able to take all my pain, fear and hopelessness and leave it on the canvas. I could then experiment with my paints and find the perfect color to define these emotions and moments. Eventually I began to paint images of good things as well, things that didn't haunt me, but merely confused me, like Katniss. Now I am painting images that come up time and time again that I feel need to be portrayed, they need their chance to be explained or justified or simply just acknowledged. I find now that the only nightmare I have left is the only nightmare that hasn't happened yet. Every night I travel back into that arena, except this time I'm the only one who leaves it. This is what haunts me now, a life without Katniss while at the same time I am haunted by a life bound to her in unwilling matrimony.

After an afternoon of mixing paints to get the perfect shade of purple to frame the beautiful, innocent face of Rue, I pack up my paints in frustration. This is one image I want to paint more than any other, and yet I can't find the right colors to do it. I get up and go to my mother's house for dinner. As we all sit around the television waiting for the broadcast I notice that my mother is getting quieter and quieter until finally she gets up and leaves the room. I follow her into the kitchen.

"Mom? Is everything okay?" She turns around quickly brushing her eyes.

"What? Oh yes, I just realized that we need to make more bread for the morning, I don't think we made enough loaves."

"I'm sure it will be fine, come watch the announcement with us. Aren't you interested to see what they'll change"

"No, I'm not, it can't be good. Last time they doubled the number of kids to go into that arena, a friend of your father's went in and never came back. I have no interest in knowing what they'll do to us this year. Especially since your future wife has stirred up so much trouble, I'm sure they have something terrible in mind as punishment" is her angry answer.

"That trouble she stirred up is the only reason I'm here right now, I wouldn't have survived if she didn't stir up some trouble." I answer back, feeling some anger lash up within me. My mother has never valued me or my abilities. She has never supported me and even bet against me in the games. I am about to tell her this when she crosses the room and embraces me. It has been years since I have felt her arms around me, and yet they still feel like home.

"I know that, and am so grateful everyday that she did but I'm scared. The Capitol does not accept being mocked, and they will not allow you two to continue on getting away with it for much longer. I fear that what they do to you will be worse than death, that by the time they are done with you, you will be begging for it." As she pulls back from me I can see tears in her eyes. "You are just a child, and yet you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, and as your mother I am incapable of helping you." I gently reach over and wipe away a stray tear.

"I can't promise you that everything will be okay, but I can promise you that I will never beg for my death. Should the Capitol wish me dead, I have no doubt that they will accomplish it, but I will never ask them to end it, no matter what. They can control how and when I die, but they cannot control how I greet it. That is all mine, and they will never get the satisfaction of getting it. So don't worry mom, I'll be fine and so will you."

"Peeta! It's not the reading of the card, come see! Quick!" My father's voice booms through the house. My mother and I head back into the living room to be greeted by images of Katniss in a wedding dress. Apparently the Capitol will be voting on which one she should wear. I am shocked by how stunning she looks, each one gives her an innocent look, she actually looks her age while her long dark hair reminds us that she is menacing and strong. My breathe leaves my body and I have a hard time getting it back. I then look at her face and realize how sad she looks, she hides it well behind her subtle smile, but it is there in her eyes, misery. She does not want to marry me, that much is clear. This realization hits me like a punch to my gut and I get up to leave, preferring to suffer alone. Just as I'm about to walk out the door my mother appears around the corner.

"There is another message to hear, it's probably the reading of the card. You probably don't want to miss it." I can see the pity in her eyes as I begin to walk back into the room and I hate it.

President Snow appears on the screen and begins to tell the story of the Hunger Games and the purpose of the Quarter Quell. I tune out and focus on the pain I feel in my heart, she doesn't want to marry me. The thought of it makes her miserable, how can I marry her? I have to, I don't have a choice, but how can I live with myself?

"On the seventy fifth anniversary, as a reminder to the rebels that even the strongest among them cannot overcome the power of the Capitol, the male and female tributes will be reaped from their existing pool of victors"

My head turns automatically towards the TV, I am greeted by the gaze of my mother, which is brimming over with tears, and my father who looks as stunned as I feel.

"Existing pool of victors... does that mean... am I..." I can't form a thought let alone a sentence. Then it hits me, there are two male victors from District 12, but only one female. Katniss is going back into the Hunger Games, my mother was right, the Capitol wants us to beg for our lives. I hear a sharp gasp and then everything goes black.

I wake up to the voice of my father calling my name. I sit up feeling disoriented and begin to ask what happened when it hits me, Katniss is going back to the arena, and that means, so am I.

I get up and walk out my parents house. I don't know where I'm going but before I realize it I'm standing at Katniss's front door looking at a very frightened Prim.

"She's not here Peeta. When she heard the news she just took off, I don't know where she went." I turn around feeling numb and head over to Haymitch's house. I walk in not even bothering to knock and find him digging around for something under the sink.

"I'm going back Haymitch, I'm going back into that arena with her."

"Shit. What the hell are you doing barging into my house like this? Get out."

"No. I want your word. If my name gets picked you will not volunteer. I am going into that arena." I state as I meet his gaze.

"Now why would I volunteer to go back into those games boy? You think it's me you gotta convince?"

"She doesn't get a say in this, she can't stop me from going in. Neither can you, we both know that the Capitol want me and her in that arena. Me and her are the ones who screwed everything up, and they tend to get what they want. Besides they'll want to give their audience a good show, what's better then the engaged star crossed lovers getting torn apart in front of their eyes."

"They didn't get what they wanted last time with you boy, you think the audience is going to want both of you dead? What use are you then? It's Katniss they want dead. You, a heartbroken boy, are a perfect reminder to the districts of what the Capitol will do."

"Or a reminder to the rebels of why they need to keeping fighting, that they will never be safe, that their loved ones will never be safe until the Capitol is gone. You see Haymitch, you're not the only sales man here. You can't stop me from going back into that arena, so you might as well help me while I'm there."

"What did you have in mind boy?"

"She lives. I die. She comes home to Prim and her mother and Gale. I don't"

"Again, that is not up to me boy. You think I have any control over what that girl does? I haven't got a god damn chance at convincing her to let you die."

"So don't convince her. Look, I have a bad leg and almost zero skill. We're going up against hardened fighters, killers who will kill us on sight. I'll do everything I can to keep her alive, and then once I no longer can, you do the rest. Bottom line is, she comes home."

"I don't suppose your gonna let this go, change your mind"

"Not a chance. I want your word Haymitch. You have to promise that you will do everything you can to bring her home, and you won't waste any of those resources on me."

"Alright boy, if that's what you want, then there is nothing I can do to stop you. Doesn't make a difference to me which one of you I try to keep alive, bottom line is, neither of you are making it out alive. It's like you said, the Capitol has a habit of getting what it wants."

"One more thing Haymitch. You can drink yourself into a stupor all you want tonight and after the games I don't care if you are ever sober again, but until these games are over, you stay sober and do everything in your power to see our deal through. Agreed?" I can see the hesitation in his face as he glances down at the bottle in his hand, and then suddenly determination streaks across it.

"Done, now get out boy your ruining my last night of intoxication."

With that I get up and leave him to his business. As I step out onto the porch it hits me. I am going back into that arena. So I take a turn down the street and begin my long night with a walk in the cool night air. Tomorrow I will be strong, and I will begin working towards a victory for Katniss. Tonight, I will be weak, I will mourn the loss of my life and I will allow my fear and pain to consume me. I will grieve for my parents and brothers and I will pity those who come after me. I will come to terms with my fate and accept the role I will play in the life of Katniss Everdeen. Perhaps I cannot be a companion, nor will I be an observer. I will be a rung in her ladder of life, I will lift her up and help her to succeed. She is my life and while she lives I will never truly be dead. This is going to be a long, starless night.

_Alright, and there you have the wonderful Peeta. I'm really nervous about your reactions to this one because he is a very popular character whom people feel very passionate about. So Review, Review, Review! I should have another chapter up within the next two days so please tell me what you think. Also as always, suggestions for point of views are always welcome._


	5. No More Me

_Okay, so I decided to post the other chapter right away since you all had to wait so long! Enjoy. Hopefully it was worth the wait._

_I do not own the characters, nor do I own the plot._

**No More Me**

"Daddy, Daddy look at me!" I turn around quickly to see my oldest daughter splashing around in the lake where she is supposed to be digging up roots.

"I see you! Wow your really getting good, have you been sneaking out here without me to practice?" I tease as I approach the shore, "I thought you were digging up roots for supper. Mom will have both our heads if we come home empty handed."

"No she won't! We'll give her a thousand kisses instead and then she'll forgive us" giggles Katniss as she splashes around in the water, soaking up the sunlight.

While our youngest daughter Prim is a lot like her mother, Katniss is me through and through. The likeness is uncanny at times. Physically she got the seam look, olive skin and dark hair with those great big grey eyes which mirror my own. The similarities go much deeper than that though. She also got my love of music and my hatred for being cooped up. When we first found out we were pregnant I wanted a boy, a son who I could teach to hunt and provide for a family, but when she came I knew instantly that there would never be a boy that could replace her in my heart. She is bright and curious, always asking questions and memorizing edible plants and hunting. She takes her job as my assistant very seriously and is tough as nails, my little girl is a fighter, there is no doubt about that.

"Get out of the water little duck, you're going to shrivel up into a raisin. Besides we need to get back so we can sell some of this game.

"Did you catch anything good Daddy?" she asks as she pulls herself out of the water and begins running towards me.

"A couple of squirrels for Mr. Mellark and some rabbits that we can sell at the Hob, then the rest we can take home to mom for some stew. We also have a bunch of wild onions that we can take back and add to the stew"

"Sounds good to me dad, I'll carry the wild onions" she answers as she becomes all serious again. The playful eleven year old has disappeared and been replaced by my loyal hunting companion. As we walk back to the fence Katniss asks me to tell her stories about hunting and growing up. Finally, right before we cross under the fence she stops and asks me to sing a song for the mockingjays. I oblige immediately and begin to hum a short tune and then listen as the birds around begin to sing along. Shortly after Katniss has joined in and is humming along while gazing up affectionately at the birds above her.

After we get back into town we head immediately into the Hob and sell our rabbit to Greasy Sal. Then make a beeline for the bakery where Mr. Mellark will pay top dollar for a squirrel, and a little extra if Katniss is the one making the sale.

"Ah, Everdeen good to see you! Did you bring me some fine squirrel today?"

"I sure did. Three of them to be exact" I watch as a small blonde head appears behind his father looking curiously out the door. "Hey Peeta, how are you?" he looks surprised at being addressed by me, as usual and then mutters a quick reply before retreating back into his home. His dad returns with the money and we leave before his lovely wife decides to greet us as well.

"Daddy, why does Peeta never talk to us?" Katniss asks as we head home.

"I think you scare him with your wild eyes and unkept hair. You look like a forest monster coming to eat the unfortunate townsfolk of District 12" I laugh as we continue up the road.

"I do not! Mom says I'm as pretty as can be!"

"Well your mom's a liar" I laugh as I start to jog up the road further. Katniss takes the bait and begins to chase me up the road, I slow down and let her catch me.

" Take that back!" she yells as she attempts to tackle me to the ground.

"Okay, Okay! I take it back. You are the most beautiful girl in all of District 12, no wait, all of Panem. Just don't tell your mom I said that" I laugh as we finally reach the house.

After dinner I tuck both Katniss and Prim in and sing them a lullaby. Then rejoin my beautiful wife by the fire.

"Did they go down alright?" she asks as I take a seat and pour myself some tea.

"Katniss was sleeping before I turned off the light, she spent all afternoon swimming around that lake"

"I still don't know if it's a good idea for her to be going out there. I think sometimes you forget that she is only eleven years old."

"She's been going out there for years now, it would be impossible to stop her now. She has the bug just as bad as I do. Besides someone will need to have the knowledge and skill to provide for you if something should happen to me." Is my standard reply in this daily conversation.

"Nothing is going to happen to you. You'll be fine, we'll all be fine. Though I still don't think teaching our daughter how to be a criminal is a good idea on any level. You get away with it now because of how laid back Cray is, but do you remember what it used to be like? All those whippings and executions? It's still against the law, you could still be punished"

I smile at her, I know she worries, and with good reason too. Though sometimes I don't think she worries enough. She never considers the possibility that something could happen to me. That one day I could no longer be here. If that were to happen, someone needs to be able to feed the family. It's her unyielding faith, her optimism that I love most about her, but I fear that if she ever lost one of us it could also be her undoing.

"Good thing I married a healer then isn't it? I'm teaching our daughter the right laws, providing for yourself and family is not a crime, it is my right as a father and husband. No Capitol or power hungry president is going to take that away from me." I look over and see she has begun to cry.

"It's only six months away you know"

"I know, I've been counting down the days just as meticulously as you have since the day she was born." I answer hoping to avoid this conversation. We have both known for a while that it is eating us up inside, but speaking about it out loud makes it real. Makes it unavoidable.

"How did twelve years go by so fast? I thought we would have more time. I thought we would have forever. We should have forever."

"We should, but thanks to the evil of the Capitol we aren't guaranteed anything. We just have to hope for the best. Besides, thanks to my hunting she won't need to sign up for tesseree so her name will only be in the pot one time. Her chances of getting picked are basically zero."

"But there is still a chance" is her small, muttered reply.

"Listen, you can't think like that. You are a great mother and we have a great daughter and it is going to stay that way. Don't grieve for a loss that has not happened yet. There is so much pain and loss in this world already, no point making up more."

"I know your right, I just don't know what I would do without any of you. My life would end, I wouldn't be able to carry on." I know this statement is true, as much as I love my wife, the loss of a child would be her undoing. This is one of the many reasons that none of my children will ever take out a tesseree, the Capitol can take my children, but I'm certainly not going to help them do it. I swore on the day they were born that they would see a ripe old age, and I intend to see that promise through.

The next morning, I awake much too early and begin to prepare for work. After kissing my ladies on their foreheads I begin to head out the door when I hear little feet running across the floor. As I turn around I see Katniss running to me. She jumps into my arms and whispers a quick goodbye before going to crawl into bed with her sleeping mother. I laugh quietly to myself at the pure joy I feel everyday and the amount of luck I've had in order to wind up with this amazing family.

Other workers greet me as we all join the queue slowly marching to our personal hell. I hate the mines. They are dark and crowded and stuffy. Being surrounded by rock always fills me with this sense of being squished and squeezed. I am secretly terrified every day I go down here, this would be the worst place to die, alone and buried under rock and dirt. Still I march down into the elevator shafts every morning. The whole time I'm down there I think of the forest and fresh air and Katniss running around me laughing and scaring away all the game.

Around mid afternoon is when it begins, the screaming. I know immediately that it is not good, people around me begin to panic and run. Their running is futile, where will they go? Farther underground? No. I will sit here and wait for whatever comes my way. As I sit down I see a flame approaching from the far end of the tunnel. It appears to be moving slowly, but I know it will be here soon enough. Suddenly all around me I can see the forest, the fire is still coming, but now it is eating up trees and grass instead of men. Then right before the fire reaches me, I see Katniss standing there looking at me. She is calling out to me and laughing, then I hear her voice saying "it'll be okay daddy, we will be okay" followed by the sweet hum of her beautiful voice.

Then for the briefest moment, so quick I almost miss it, she is framed by the fire. She almost appears as though she is on fire, but something is off. She is smiling at me. There is no pain in her face. Suddenly I am engulfed by fire and the pain is unbearable, but I can still hear the humming, can still hear her telling me everything is going to be alright.

Then there is nothing, no fire, no pain and no more me.

_Okay so the more you review, the more motivated I will be to write the next point of view! Either way it will be posted by next weekend I hope. As always your suggestions are welcomed._

_Thanks everyone!_


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